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warshawlawIt could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress -- Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself -- Mark Twain
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer -- Will Rogers
The problem with political jokes is they get elected -- Henry Cate
The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites' -- Larry Hardiman
‘Politics is the art of controlling your environment.' That is one of the key things I learned in these years, and I learned it the hard way. Anybody who thinks that 'it doesn't matter who's President' has never been Drafted and sent off to fight and die in a vicious, stupid War on the other side of the World -- or been beaten and gassed by Police for trespassing on public property -- or been hounded by the IRS for purely political reasons -- or locked up in the Cook County Jail with a broken nose and no phone access and twelve perverts wanting to stomp your *** in the shower. That is when it matters who is President or Governor or Police Chief. That is when you will wish you had voted.—Hunter S. Thompson
I am working for the time when unqualified blacks, browns, and women join the unqualified men in running our government -- Cissy Farenthold
If you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it -- Anthony J. D'Angelo
If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito -- Betty Reese
In the past, apathy was a moral failure. Today, it is a form of moral and political suicide -- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies -- Groucho Marx
These ballot initiatives remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so long as that dream doesn't make Midwesterners feel icky! -- Lewis Black
Republicans have nothing but bad ideas and Democrats have no ideas -- Lewis Black
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death -- George Carlin
Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores are us. -- P. J. O'Rourke
Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there. -- P. J. O'Rourke
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. -- P. J. O'Rourke
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it. -- P. J. O'Rourke
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop -- P. J. O'Rourke