Should I block this bidder?

BobC · #1 10-04-2022, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by philliesfan

That is very interesting, because when you started this thread that is exactly what you did, you asked people for their opinions. Yes I did. Oh, and your request for opinions was unsolicited by those who responded. They were solicited as I asked for responses. So now I get it, (no you really don�t) you weren't really honestly asking for people's opinions at all, were you? Yes I was. You were just posting and looking for people to validate you and a decision you had probably already made, so you could feel better about yourself and what you decided? Nope. Hmmmmm, interesting!!!!!

And when people do respond to your unsolicited requests, it seems in your mind that somehow absolves you from being the one who started this whole thing to begin with? Sadly, this is almost the same thing you pulled on the potential Buyer/Watcher who responded to your unsolicited offer to start this all off. I'm guessing that you may not really have wanted any alternate opinions, or a negotiation of price, at all. And if not in either case, why did YOU initiate things in both instances to begin with then? What's the old saying, "Be careful what you ask for, because you might just get it!". If the people YOU are approaching don't respond in almost exactly the way you want or expect, so what, why get all worked up and upset about it? I have no idea where you get the idea I am all worked up over it or upset about it. I couldn�t care less. I was just wondering if others here saw it as a potential problem. I got answers for both points of view which I do appreciate.

This now appears to be a second recent instance of you taking offense at the way someone responds to you, over something you initiated, started, and ASKED for responses to. In which case it could make some observers liken it to a blossoming behavioral pattern. Now that is funny. I had originally just offered some alternate thoughts and perspectives on your issue, and had not judged or condemned you at all. No you did not, nor did I of you. However, as it seems I come across in dealing with almost everybody here on this forum when there is a disagreement of opinion, I go out of my way to try and present facts and logical theories and arguments, and respond to and answer all questions posed. I listened to your responses and Yet appallingly, I rarely, if ever, get the courtesy of a similar reaction and response to my questions. So let me try asking this once again. Why exactly does a potential Buyer's/Watcher's response to YOUR unsolicited offer, and their negotiation technique in response, suddenly and automatically make them a bad buyer, needful of blocking? In negotiations, the seller has a starting point to make the sale and the buyer has his starting point to make a purchase. Normally, a seller comes down in price and the buyer goes up in price eventually meeting around halfway. That�s the normal process for negotiations.

And please don't say it is because you have a gut feeling, because that is really no answer at all. If that is the case though, then you need to ask yourself what is the real reason behind such a gut feeling to begin with.

And as for the improper use of that phrase, yes, there are instances where you could appropriately have used the word COULD instead of COULDN'T, except in the context and meaning of how you used it, that is not one of those instances. Ask your wife if you don't believe me. What! Ask my wife? So she can be right again! Ugh. I don�t need that. I�ll take your for it.

So what if the potential Buyer/Seller doesn't negotiate the way you like, or normally expect? Is there some law I'm unaware of that says they have to? I'm just trying to figure out what your reason is for thinking you have to ban them, and to this point you still really haven't answered that question. The only thing I have been able to take away from everything you've said so far is that for some reason you think this person is possibly a bad buyer because you apparently don't like the way they negotiated with you. But you haven't stated that exactly, and I'm not trying to put words in your mouth. I'm just trying to understand how a person's negotiation technique possibly equates to how good (or bad) of a buyer they'd be.

What I have been able to get out of you is that this person did not act as you would normally act were you in their place, in regard to how they negotiate, and that is about it. If that is the underlying reasoning, and you have a natural distrust for dealing with those that may think or act differently than you in some aspects, so be it. Was just trying to understand where you were coming from. Though you downplayed possibly being mad or upset with this individual, the fact is they still got under your skin enough to prompt you to start a thread about it. So it seems you must have had some internal conflicts about what to do after all. I was merely offering some other points of view and perspectives to possibly help you see things from both sides, and better allow you to make the right decision for yourself. I was not expecting to be told my opinion doesn't matter to you though, just because it was not what you may have wanted to hear, or expected. But clearly I am not the sole person having or suggesting a somewhat different perspective and response to what you've apparently already decided. Good luck with the sale of your item. Hopefully you'll get some bidders bumping the price up over what you expected.

philliesfan · #2 10-04-2022, 08:58 PM

OK in brief, I thought his negotiation process in lowering his previous offer was not typical of how negotiations work so I was confused by this and figured he may be a problem.
I was not sure and that is why I started the thread. I heard opinions from both sides which is appreciated and what I asked for.

When I said your opinion does not matter to me was an attempt at humor. Yes it was. I used the could / couldn't comment in my response of your correcting my English and having an opposing point of view. That is why at the end of my comment I stated that I respect everyone's opinion. I thought you may have realized that.

Directly · #3 10-08-2022, 11:19 AM

I do ban tire kickers who purchase items and after I try to communicate within 4 days asking if they still want the item then they don't have the curiosity to advise either way, I write them off!--NO PAY is now a common problem on eBay --

Eric72 · #4 10-10-2022, 05:38 PM

Was this an auction or a Buy It Now listing?
If the OP was willing to take $25, he would have simply accepted that offer. The "buyer" offering $20 later in the process doesn't really make sense. The seller didn't accept a higher offer, so why send a lower one?
Sellers on eBay have a "Tasks" section of their seller page. Within that section, there's a "Suggested actions" item. Some people, myself included, will routinely clear this by sending offers.
Buyers shouldn't get offended because the offer they got was "unsolicited" and/or not a steep enough discount. Someone offered to sell something cheaper than it was before. $45 to $39 is a discount of 13.33% That doesn't seem like a valid cause for angst.
The seller then went down to $35, a total discount of 22.22% Again, this doesn't seem like an unreasonable thing to have done.

Candidly, I would have blocked the buyer, too. The unconventional negotiating "tactic" makes no sense to me. If I wasn't going to take $25 for that, why would I take $20? If it was a typo, then I've lost a customer...a tire-kicker who apparently loves to spend time haggling and doesn't spend time making sure they've typed their two-digit offer correctly.

BobC · #5 10-10-2022, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eric72

Was this an auction or a Buy It Now listing?
If the OP was willing to take $25, he would have simply accepted that offer. The "buyer" offering $20 later in the process doesn't really make sense. The seller didn't accept a higher offer, so why send a lower one?
Sellers on eBay have a "Tasks" section of their seller page. Within that section, there's a "Suggested actions" item. Some people, myself included, will routinely clear this by sending offers.
Buyers shouldn't get offended because the offer they got was "unsolicited" and/or not a steep enough discount. Someone offered to sell something cheaper than it was before. $45 to $39 is a discount of 13.33% That doesn't seem like a valid cause for angst.
The seller then went down to $35, a total discount of 22.22% Again, this doesn't seem like an unreasonable thing to have done.

Candidly, I would have blocked the buyer, too. The unconventional negotiating "tactic" makes no sense to me. If I wasn't going to take $25 for that, why would I take $20? If it was a typo, then I've lost a customer...a tire-kicker who apparently loves to spend time haggling and doesn't spend time making sure they've typed their two-digit offer correctly.

I can understand that logic more if the potential buyer approached the seller first and initiated the contact. But not when the seller started it. It is hilarious how some people can only see this from one side of the story, and if it isn't from their side, the party they started the negotiation with must automatically be bad and worthy of blocking. Un-effing-believable!!!!!!

Truth seems to be we don't really know the complete other side of the story as I don't believe the OP ever asked the other party why they came back with an even lower price offer. I had already wondered if it was possibly a typo and they meant to type $30. I don't know, and apparently neither does anyone else. But if some people want to rush to judgements without knowing the full story from both sides, so be it.

Eric72 · #6 10-10-2022, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BobC

I can understand that logic more if the potential buyer approached the seller first and initiated the contact. But not when the seller started it. It is hilarious how some people can only see this from one side of the story, and if it isn't from their side, the party they started the negotiation with must automatically be bad and worthy of blocking. Un-effing-believable!!!!!!

Truth seems to be we don't really know the complete other side of the story as I don't believe the OP ever asked the other party why they came back with an even lower price offer. I had already wondered if it was possibly a typo and they meant to type $30. I don't know, and apparently neither does anyone else. But if some people want to rush to judgements without knowing the full story from both sides, so be it.

Bob,

I'm not sure anyone will ever know the full story from both sides. Absent complete information, those who have discussed the topic up to this point have likely filled in the information gaps through their own individual paradigms.

In my particular case, personal experience has likely colored my opinion. I've been selling on eBay for 20+ years. During that time, I've occasionally dealt with would-be scammers. Along the way, I've made a few observations. Among these, I've noticed that scammers often exhibit odd behavior. Although this isn't always the case, and they don't always provide the luxury of revealing this before making a purchase, I've had more than a few instances of "...should have seen this coming, the signs were there..."

So yes, some people rush to judgment. Since you were quoting me as you made that statement, it is reasonable to surmise you've drawn that conclusion about me. I understand why one might rush to that judgment. If they didn't know I've spent two decades forming my opinion of odd eBay buyers, they wouldn't possibly have the full story.

This has been quite an interesting thread. What surprises me most is the amount of apparent passion from many of the people posting. I would not have expected this by simply reading the original post.

BobC · #7 10-11-2022, 01:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eric72

Bob,

I'm not sure anyone will ever know the full story from both sides. Absent complete information, those who have discussed the topic up to this point have likely filled in the information gaps through their own individual paradigms.

In my particular case, personal experience has likely colored my opinion. I've been selling on eBay for 20+ years. During that time, I've occasionally dealt with would-be scammers. Along the way, I've made a few observations. Among these, I've noticed that scammers often exhibit odd behavior. Although this isn't always the case, and they don't always provide the luxury of revealing this before making a purchase, I've had more than a few instances of "...should have seen this coming, the signs were there..."

So yes, some people rush to judgment. Since you were quoting me as you made that statement, it is reasonable to surmise you've drawn that conclusion about me. I understand why one might rush to that judgment. If they didn't know I've spent two decades forming my opinion of odd eBay buyers, they wouldn't possibly have the full story.

This has been quite an interesting thread. What surprises me most is the amount of apparent passion from many of the people posting. I would not have expected this by simply reading the original post.

Eric,

I understand where different people can be coming from, and at least you have said that you have had personal experiences that affect your own opinion on this topic, and I can respect that. I just didn't understand why the others are so quick to vote to ban this person because of their possible way of negotiating. Nobody was really giving any solid meaningful reasons, aside from basically the person didn't seem right or normal somehow. What I don't see is the correlation between how one negotiates or barters, and what that has to do with what kind of buyer they're going to be.

Think of it like this, a guy's walking down the sidewalk next to a used car dealer, just minding his own business and looking at the cars as he's walking by. All of a sudden a salesman runs up to him and grabs him and says come on, I'll make you a special deal on one of the cars I saw you looking at as you walked by. The guy walking by goes along just to not make a scene. So the salesman drags him over to a red sporty car marked $5K, and says to the guy I can let you have it for today for $4,200. The guy, who really wasn't initially interested in actually buying the car, figures OK, he'll offer a price where he actually would consider buying the car, and gives the salesman his top offer, $3,500. Well, the salesman quickly thinks to himself there's no way he'll let that car go that cheap, but instead of just thanking the guy for at least listening to him and letting him go on his way, he comes back and pushes at the guy some more to still try make a sale. And this time it is with another even lower offer of just $4K, but with the salesman now telling the guy that is his final lowest offer, take it or leave it. So now the guy is perturbed and thinking, he wasn't that interested in the car to begin with, and he already made this salesman his best offer, which he doesn't want to take. Instead, he got a lower counteroffer and ultimatum thrown back in his face by the salesman, who can't take a hint and is still trying to push a deal. So the guy thinks, how can he get his position across to the salesman? He just wants to get this over with, but since the salesman is still pushing to make a sale, he wonders if maybe he drops his offer even lower, the salesman may be desperate enough to sell and comes back to see if the guy will take the car for his original offer price of $3,500 after all. So the guy counters back at the salesman with a $3,200 offer, figuring the salesman will either lower his asking price again, or realize he isn't getting what he wants for the car from this guy, and finally terminate the negotiating. And of course, finally let the guy continue walking on his way on the sidewalk. Except the salesman has a screw loose and gets upset with the guy not agreeing with what he thinks is such great deal, and daring to negotiate back against him. So he tells the guy that he made the offer to, to get off his used car lot and don't ever come back, or he'll call the cops on him trespassing. Even though it was the salesman that dragged the guy onto his car lot to listen to his deal to begin with. Then a month or two later, the guy ends up finding a similar car, at a different dealership, asking about what he was willing to pay for such a car in the first place when talking to the salesman that has now banned him. So he cuts this new dealership a check for the full amount they wanted, and drives away a happy owner, while the dealership gladly deposits his check in their bank. And then take a story like that to Reddit's "Am I The A$$hole" site and see who the majority over there sides with.

Now take the "car" that was being sold in my example, and add a "d" to the end of it to make it a "card" that was being sold instead..........................

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